Harmony Family

Jo meets the Harmony family in Hutchinson, Kansas where Jacob (27) and Erin (29) have three boys Jake (11), Ian (5), and Grant (3). Jake isn't the problem, but his brothers are due to fighting like cat and dog. Grant has a ferocious temper, he will bite furniture especially backpacks until he bleeds from the mouth. Grant has a separation anxiety, when Erin leaves, Grant will throw a fit, want 20 kisses and bye hugs from her and Jacob will hold him down but Grant will chase the minivan towards the highway. During bedtimes, Grant will sleep in his bed until midnight, wake up, grab his pillow, bring it into the master bedroom, evict Jacob, go to sleep, and Jacob comes out to sleep on the sofa. At restaurants and dinner at home, Grant climbs around, refuses to stay in place, and screams when he doesn't get his own way. Although, Ian doesn't act out as much as Grant does, but he is very disrespectful. he will talk back, hit, instigate trouble, torment Grant, call people names with a swear word, and at restaurants he behaves but hits Jacob when he is told to eat.

Techniques: Naughty Spot, Separation, Dining Out, Stay In Bed

Submission Reel
As the taxi drives through sweeping Midwest plains, Jo views the Harmony Family's cry for help on DVD. Jacob, a construction worker, and Erin, an RN at a local clinic, need help with their children. Grant is a mama's boy who gets upset when Erin leaves the house and bites furniture when he doesn't get his way. "Grant, biting the armchair?" coos Jo with raised her eyebrows. The parents say that Ian is the instigator and gets into fights with Grant a lot. Jake is aggravated by having two younger brothers who make so much trouble. Erin says she is the disciplinarian and Jacob says he only disciplines when he feels it's needed. They go out to eat at least twice a week and are prepared for embarrassment every time and it is a disaster. At night, Erin reports that Grant will sleep in bed for 4 hours, then brings his pillow into the parents' room and climb into bed. Erin cries and says she feels her family is falling apart. "You guys need some good help. I'm on my way!" declares Jo.

Observation
Jo arrives at the Harmony Family home. Jake shakes hands with Jo in greeting. Erin tries to get Grant to greet Jo and shake her hand, but he refuses. Ian does shake Jo's hand. Erin has to run to the store, so Jo gets to see Grant fighting to prevent her from leaving. He tries getting into the car, then once Erin gets into the car and drives away, runs screaming down the long dusty road that leads from the house to the highway. Jo reports her confusion at seeing Erin stop the car when she should have just driven away. "What a palaver!" she says. After Erin leaves, Jo observes what Jacob does to parent the boys. He leaves them alone in the front yard trampoline to play. He and Jo stand near the porch watching the boys tussle in the trampoline. Jake tells them to stop fighting. Jacob calls it playing and goes inside, but Jo declares that it is far too rough. While Grant screams in the trampoline, Jo looks on in confusion. When Erin got back, it was time for Grant to have a nap. When she turned the computer off, he threw a fit. He was putting his fingers in his mouth, bit a backpack, slamming a chair against a desk, then running all over the house, and screaming. Fed up with the chasing, Erin tells him, "If you get off your bed again, you have to in the breezeway!" After more chasing, Erin does put Grant there. Jo calls the breezeway the "cold conservatory area" and notes that with Grant now outside banging on the door and screaming, it has now spiraled out of control. She also notes that Erin in doing this, has "shooed him into the foyer like some pet!". Erin eventually lets him back in, and asks him to quit acting like an animal. Erin tries to get the boys inside to get ready to go out to dinner. Ian and Grant are fighting again on a John Deere kid car. Grant is trying to get in the car while Ian repeatedly hits Grant. Grant screams and grunts and over this, Erin is telling Grant that Ian is not going to play with him and tells Ian to go. Ian just flings his hand in Erin's face dismissively with a pout and scream. "He just doesn't listen to Mum," observes Jo. Erin again notes that she is the disciplinarian and Jacob won't do anything unless it's needed. Jo notes that she has just seen Erin do all the work and that Jacob doesn't seem to help out at all. Erin tries getting Grant to walk himself to the car and Grant emits a loud grunting/shouting noise in response. Jo asks, "Is that how he talks to you?" Erin says, "Yes, all the time." Jacob stands off to the side smiling for no apparent reason. The family proceed to eating out at dinnertime. Grant was climbing around on the table and Ian was disrespecting Jacob. Grant was making demands for knives, and later on, dessert, which Erin refused to give in at that point. The family exit the restaurant in disappointment, due to the usual bad behavior that Grant was exhibiting. Jo then proceeds to ask Jacob to stay over the night on the couch, so she can observe Grant "evicting" his father from the bedroom. Surely enough, at 3:43AM (clock radio time), Grant went down the hallway and evicted Jacob from his spot in the bed, so that Grant can sleep with his mother. Jacob then proceeds to sleep on the couch, and Jo then leaves having seen enough.

Family Meeting
Jo proceeded to have a family meeting with Erin and Jacob. She considered both pushovers, followed by questions about their loss of control. She talked about Grant's misbehavior and bedtime, and talked in general about both Grant and Ian's lack of respect towards both Erin and Jacob. Erin and Jacob both commented that these were things that needed to be said, with Jacob adding that they have no defense to Jo's remarks about their family.

Ian and Grant vs. The Naughty Spot
Jo then starts off playing football with the rest of the family. Ian, however, misbehaved and tried to hog the ball. Jacob had to put Ian on the Naughty Spot for 5 minutes, both outside and eventually inside. Grant then hit Erin, which landed him immediately on the Naughty Spot for 3 minutes without warning. Eventually, Ian and Grant gave in to the discipline and apologized to their parents.

Grant and the Separation Technique.
Jo talked to the parents about the technique and showed Erin the steps. Ian and Grant were having snacks. Erin got ready, told Grant that she would be back in a little bit, and left. Jacob kept Ian and Grant occupied. Grant didn't run down towards the highway.

Grant and Ian behave in the Restaurant
Jo had the boys fit the coloring books and crayons for Ian's and Grant's backpacks so that they won't get bored or play up at dinner time. Erin set up clear expectations for Ian and Grant but they grunted. Jo said that if they misbehave, they will be given a warning and if they ignore the warning, they will be outside in the car until Jake, Erin, and Jacob have finished their food. Ian behaved when they got their table, but Grant used a loud voice but Erin told him that he needed to keep his voice down but Grant bounced in his seat. Jo tells Erin the second time Grant does that, he will be given a warning and a third time, he will be outside in the car and corrects the tone of voice. The boys however behaved.

The Stay-In-Bed Technique
Jo persuaded Erin to let her husband do bedtime because it would be great. Jacob read Ian and Grant a story. Jo told Erin to relax and let it go. Both parents said goodnight to Ian and Grant. While Jake went to bed, everyone was asleep and Jo decided to stay around. Jo was asleep til the time Grant wakes up from his bed. Grant woke up, but Erin had to take him back twice. It was to say nothing the second time and every time after the second time Grant gets out of bed.